


Three Times Alex Reaches for Kara's Hand (and the one time she doesn't)

by crna_macka



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: College, Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-12
Updated: 2015-12-12
Packaged: 2018-05-06 07:55:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5408960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crna_macka/pseuds/crna_macka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written in response to a tumblr prompt (which is now the title).</p>
    </blockquote>





	Three Times Alex Reaches for Kara's Hand (and the one time she doesn't)

**Author's Note:**

> Written in response to a tumblr prompt (which is now the title).

_three._  
  
It doesn’t occur to Alex just how rare casual, comforting touch is in her life until she’s fourteen-going-on-fifteen and Kara Zor-El drops out of the sky and into her family. Kara, who is afraid of popcorn makers but not afraid of flying. Kara, who is afraid of getting As in gym class but not afraid to debate politics with religious protestors.  
  
They’re on a campus visit in the spring of Alex’s junior year when Kara meets the Westboro Baptist Church for the first time. Technically, it’s the first time for Alex, too, but she at least knew they existed. She hesitates only a moment to steel herself, then walks past -  
  
And realizes that the volume is rising behind her and her bubbly little shadow is no longer by her side. The younger girl is right in the thick of things, arguing with a middle-aged woman with an over-sized picket sign, and Alex has to _sprint_ when calling Kara’s name makes no difference. Without thinking, she does exactly what Kara has done to her countless times before: she grabs Kara’s hand like a tether to ground her.  
  
“They’re not worth it,” Alex says, refusing to even look at the men, women, and even children clustered mere feet away from them. Kara can barely tear herself away until Alex grips her hand tighter and physically pulls.

  
  
_two._  
  
She chooses Stanford, in the end. It’s a long drive up the coast, but Kara insists that she be allowed to come along and help Alex move in. “I can do the heavy lifting,” she says. Alex is secretly grateful - not just for Kara’s super strength, not just for the buffer between her and Eliza, but because it’s two more days with her sister. Her best friend. Who she won’t see again for months.  
  
She pushes that thought from her head the best she can. They bring the boxes in, up the crowded stairs, down the hall to Alex’s room. The room she’ll be sharing with some nice blonde girl from Virginia who isn’t Kara, not by a long shot. But the girl isn’t here yet and Kara is, unpacking Alex’s clothes while Eliza makes the bed and Alex arranges her desk. They go to lunch after. They make it seem normal - except Kara, who destroys two oversized burgers instead of her usual three. Eliza even throws Alex a backhanded compliment to go with their fro-yo dessert.  
  
But it has to end eventually. Reality is waiting back on campus, no matter how much they meander en route to the dorm.  
  
“Oh my gosh, wait!” Kara suddenly interrupts the quiet pall that had fallen on them. “It’s the fountain! Eliza, can you take a picture of us at the the fountain?”  
  
Alex lets herself be led, but she’s not sure she can manage not to look miserable at the prospect of being alone for the first time in four years.  
  
“Smile, Alex,” Eliza insists, growing impatient as the two girls pose.  
  
Kara, who finds it so easy to flash that megawatt smile of hers, drapes an arm across Alex’s shoulder as if connecting a circuit. “Hey,” she says quietly, just between the two of them. “You’re going to love it here. Especially when I move in next year.”  
  
Alex reaches for the hand on her shoulder and squeezes. That’s the shot, and it’s so typical: Alex and Kara, connected at the hip, smiling at each other over some shared secret.

  
  
_one._  
  
When Kara decides on Berkeley instead, it’s okay. Alex has settled in on the Farm and is hitting her stride, and Cal is still closer than Kara was all of last year. Besides, Kara deserves to be on her own path, of her own choosing, for once. Alex is a firm believer in that. If Kara asks to cross paths every weekend, it’s because _she_ wants to, and Alex obliges. It’s the least she can do. And if at the end of freshman year, Kara wants nothing more than to go to Pride, Alex can’t say no.  
  
It’s crowded, _so crowded_ , and so colorful. So much energy and life, and it’s all reflected on Kara’s face. Alex feels an irrational jolt of fear in response.  
  
Kara is laughing when Alex tangles their fingers together. All she can think about is losing Kara in the swell of strangers. And, somehow, this sea of openness unmasking Kara’s true identity, as well. The worst possible thing.  
  
Alex doesn’t let go. She _can’t_ let go.

  
  
_and done._  
  
Her best chance to protect Kara comes at a price. First and foremost, cutting her sister out of part of her life. Putting on a mask and remembering how to lie.  
  
It turns out that lying is like riding a bike. Something Alex has never forgotten.  
  
She gets recruited by the DEO while Kara is swamped with classes and an internship. She waits until graduation is just weeks away to reveal she’s heard back on an interview for a job. A little while later, that she’s been hired. Soon after that, that she’s moving to National City. And then the kicker, that she won’t be able to come home or even visit for months during the company’s immersive training.  
  
Eliza’s displeasure is to be expected. But Kara’s?  
  
“I’ll come visit you,” Kara offers, and Alex shakes her head.  
  
“At least let me help you move in.”  
  
“No,” Alex says forcefully, not trusting herself to simply be firm. “We can’t keep doing this, Kara. At some point, one of us needs to start a new chapter without the other.”  
  
Kara starts to protest, but Alex cuts her off. “Completely without the other.”  
  
And when Kara tries to close the gap between them, the way she always does, Alex backs away. She walks out the door. She hopes, throwing all of her will at the universe, that Kara won’t follow. All it would take is the familiarity of one easy touch to keep her here, and even so, it’s all Alex can do not to reach out before she goes.


End file.
